“It’s not what you say, but how you say it.”
When I say partner, I’m referencing the partnership that is required in any type of relationship. Whether it be with my friends, family, or significant other, I too am a work in progress, but I see progress within myself.
One of the most important aspects of any relationship is communication.
Whether you are stating something positive or negative…. DELIVERY IS EVERYTHING! Something as simple as telling someone they are beautiful can be twisted and turned.
Recently, I found myself questioning how I could possibly be a friend to someone that didn’t have his or her “delivery” together. I mean…I LOVE THEM TO DEATH, and I know they mean well. But the crazy thing is– I’ve made this same excuse for YEARS. Why haven’t they realized what I’ve learned?! We are living in the same world right?!!
Our upbringing and our environment have a major impact on who we are—more than people credit it. My very own mother is one of the most kind-hearted, loving people I know. She communicates well, and I admire the way she approaches disagreements. I can only imagine who I would be if I didn’t have her as a constant role model.
Unfortunately, many people in today’s society are not in tune with reality. They play the bully at home, and don’t know how to turn it off in “the real world.”
I’ve learned that I accomplish more when I take time to formulate an alternate way to say things, that leaves room for positivity. If the person you are discussing an issue with means anything to you, take time to think about what you say before you say it.
If I trust you enough with my feelings to communicate with you—be genuine, and considerate of those feelings I allowed you to be a part of.
Lastly, something I’ve also learned this year: try and hold off on a discussion when the issue is fresh. One of the worst things we can do is base a conversation off of emotions and undeveloped thoughts. Speaking from personal experience, this only leads to dead ends and hurt feelings. Trust me.
Please, my people, take time to think about the words you are speaking.